Work and play

At work we've moved upstairs now. In fact, I'm sitting in the exact same spot I sat for my first two days in this company - full circle, eh? It's not too bad, it's a bit more traffic upstairs than what we got on the second floor, but I phase out and try to ignore it. My view has changed - I now have a view of the roof of the building next door (I'm told there's a guy who sunbathes on the roof in the summer) and the Free Mason's hall which looks like a fortress (it's made of concrete, with windows only on the top floor).

Yesterday I went out for lunch with my old boss and learned more about company politics than I ever wanted to know. Sometimes ignorance is such a bliss, but as another colleague put it - we should go in with open eyes... I guess so.

At home I made a list of all the things I need to finish before Sakura-con in April. List is surprisingly long, and we have five weekends left... It's doable, for sure, but I need to pace myself if I don't want a frantic panic two days before the con. So before my sutra class I diligently finished off couple of boring things like sewing buttons and like, and managed to cross one item off the list.

Asana no go

Went to yoga today after over a week's break. I didn't want to go, it always happens to me when I take a break and forget what it feels like. I was dragging my heels all the way in... and all the way through the practice. My wrist is bothering me and therefore I'm favoring my left side, shying away chatarungas and down-dogs... I didn't really get it together but I'm glad I went anyway. I haven't been in the mood for asana practice this year, but maybe I can turn it around again.

Out of ordinary

It's been a weird Sunday - no phone call this morning as Chu was unreachable, and even no yoga as Jesse moved today's class the next week. So I watched some more Princess Tutu and continued sewing - sewing trousers was probably unnecessary as I might have found blue capris to go with my Tsunade costume but I'm in a mood for tinkering and I wanted to see if I could still remember how to do it. They turned out ok with pockets and zippers and all, I think with second try I'd come up with a decent pair. Definitely once these cosplay projects are over I'm gonna sew some "real" clothes, too.

I've also discovered that I have slight OCD tendencies with sewing - it's rare for me to be able to concentrate on any single thing 100% but I seem to be able to do it completely with sewing... and lose the sense of time and space. Good thing is that when I notice it's happening I can intentionally stop and check if I'm hungry/thristy/in pain and do something about it.

Found it

I managed to find my package. Since I had a strong suspicion that it was my Amazon package that had gone missing, I used their tracking number on the Canada Post's own tracking system which was more helpful than Amazon's own. Turns out that the package arrived at the post office couple of hours after I was there on Monday, and I went there yesterday to ask for it again - and finally got my hands on it.

So I was watching those Princess Tutu DVDs this morning, I've now finished the first season ("Chapter of the Egg") - I will do a proper write-up on this when I've seen the whole series... But I can already say that it's without a doubt going to go into my top-5 favourite anime series ever.

Musical chairs

It's time to play musical office chairs!

Now that we're in the middle of the re-org they promised wouldn't come, and our new QA manager was announced (and immediately departed for a two week holiday), it's time to shuffle the office and move teams around. They kept the announcement till the last moment - in fact several people from development came downstairs to look at where they were going to be sitting holding the seating charts before we were told were we'd be going.

And then we got the plans, and turned out that while I got a window seat (hey, seniority counts) I had been moved a step away from Gino, my boss. Which annoyed somewhat me as I had gotten the impression that I would continue sitting next to him, and I like it since that's where the best gossip is at (and gossip in the office is... well, bread and butter... and cake, all rolled into one). So in a mock shock I messaged him (he's not in the office on Friday) and I'm afraid he got the impression that I was mad for real, fueled by Don that little devil. In any case he quickly promised me moon and the stars and we agreed to talk about it on Monday - but I think I'll be swapping seats with Don and get to sit where I wanted.

Then we took our team upstairs to look at our new home (we'll move on Monday) and all the guys were happy to indulge my temper tantrum (and I was starting to feel exceedingly silly about it) and swap the seats around. I really like our little automation team, we're really starting to get good team spirit - and I finally get Christine next to me (us girls we are both Java people, Don and the boys are Perl weirdos).

Anyway, it just hit home to me how lucky I am with Gino as my boss. He really goes the extra mile for me and us, even when it's not really that important he's willing to listen to me and my concerns and take them seriously. Lucky.

Big secret

No sign of the package...

At work we (still) live in interesting times - much to our surprise we found out that there was one internal candidate for the now vacant QA manager role, but it was a huge big enormous secret who that person was. Our three managers were given an opportunity to interview this person, but even they didn't find out who this person was until they walked into the interview with them this afternoon - I'm just surprised they weren't blindfolded and made to sign contracts in blood.

So we've all been racking our brains trying to figure out who the candidate is. Can't be this or that, would be a demotion, he or she wouldn't be interested, if it's him I'll so walk... and so on. So once Gino left for the super secret interview me and Don sat in front of Outlook and started taking educated guesses on who this person was, and then checking their calendars if they too had this "private meeting" in it. And after five minutes or so we come across a person who fits the bill - she (and it is a she) has the private meeting, she's at the right level in the company, and quite possibly unhappy where she's right now. Never knew that she had any interest for QA, but then again I don't really know her so I can't say either way.

We felt quite satisfied having solved this little mystery. Gino came back looking tired and dazed, and said they needed another interview with her, but that we will probably know by the end of the week if this person gets the job. Maybe I'll grill him more tomorrow morning to try to figure out what he really thinks of her.

Lost it

Looks like Canada Post has lost my package. When I got home on Friday there were three package cards waiting for me - so after coming back from fabric shopping on Saturday we dropped by the post office on Davie to pick them up. But only two of them were there - I thought it was strange initially that I got three cards for four items, where one of the cards had "2 packages" scribbled on it. I got two packages for my two normal cards, but the third one had apparently been delivered to another post office. So we walked to the post office on Denman, but they didn't know anything about my packages and told me to come back on Monday.

Today I was feeling doubtful, but I came back to the Denman post office - by now I had also noticed that the post boy had ticked the "available on Monday" box and not the "next day" like they normally do... so ok, the packages should have been there by now. First bad sign was that the clerk couldn't find the packages on the computer when she scanned the card in, but promised to go and have a look in the back. And came back with one package. Whose barcode didn't match my card.

See the procedure is that for each package they should leave one card, they are all barcoded so they can be tracked - this rookie of a postman messed this one up so badly... I got my one package which was nice, but now I'm afraid the second package - which they had no way of tracking or finding out where it is - has gone missing. What I'm really afraid of, is that it's my Princess Tutu DVDs - looking at the Amazon tracking page it looks like it was out for delivery on Friday, but now it's "in transit"... but in transit to where? Out for delivery in Vancouver usually means the postman has it, and in transit means it's between depos or delivery points.

Geez, how difficult can it be. Delivering packages is your job!

Not quite ninja-less entry

I was going to say that our Saturday was pretty much ninja-less, but I'd be lying.

We spent the morning doing fabric shopping for, well, two ninja costumes. In case you haven't been following my Flickr stream and are interested in my hobbies, I'm using sets for my costuming projects - two so far, Tsunade and Jiraiya.

And the evening we spent watching, well, a ninja movie - it was 2005 live-action movie Shinobi: Heart Under Blade, a Romeo and Juliet ninja story. The movie was pretty cool, and I think it would work even if you don't like ninjas - costumes, colours and action scenes were just superb. Story is an old legend about two warring ninja clans and youngsters from those clans that tragically fall in love... not exactly rocket science but there's a reason why this story keeps cropping up through the ages. I especially loved Yukie Nakama as Oboro, she was not only breathtakingly beautiful, but she played those subtle and difficult emotions that a killer who needs to choose between her clan and her lover beautifully.

Maybe tomorrow I won't write about ninjas. Maybe.

Hero's come back

Yes, pardon me while I giggle like the fangirl that I am.

Naruto: Shippuuden is finally here, and after downloading the episode this morning I dragged Dragon out of be at 7 am so I could watch it before going to work. And it's everything I hoped it would be, and more. It starts out with the scene I have most been waiting to see - they use a a non-linear approach to the storytelling and show a critical scene from a future storyline before starting from the beginning.

Quality of the animation, especially in the intro, is completely breathtaking - definitely best that I've seen in Naruto, but it measures up in any scale. New soundtrack is fantastic, they've completely redone it and it's more mature and dramatic just in the right way. Adaptation from the manga has been done skillfully, filling up the right parts and concentrating on the relevant. It's just a perfect ten, and worth all the wait.

Happy happy, joy joy. Fangirlishness over, you can come back now. Guys. Guys?

Chocolate Dragon

Living in Vancouver is fun.

Yesterday as I was strolling down the Robson street, all the chocolate shops were filled to brim with chocolate shoppers, thanks to the impending Valentines day. The funny things was, all the shops had pretty much even split of guys and girls. Namely, half of the customers were white males, while the other half were Japanese ladies -I learned that in Japan it is customary for the women to give men chocolate on Valentines day, and not the other way around.

I feel blessed to live in such an international city, you learn something new about other cultures every day!

Tea is healthier than water

"Drinking tea is actually better for you than drinking water. Water is essentially replacing fluid. Tea replaces fluids and contains antioxidants so it's got two things going for it."

Nuff said.

Paradise Kiss

Gorgeous George

And now, something for the ladies.

I haven't written any reviews here for months, not for the books I've read nor about the anime and manga that's currently capturing my heart. But here's one for you - Paradise Kiss, a 12-part josei anime series based on one of my favourite mangaka's Ai Yazawa's hit manga with the same name. I originally read the five part manga last summer, and while I had mixed feelings about the first volume once it got going I couldn't put it down before the end. When I heard there was a new anime made based on it I literally couldn't wait - the series is so visual seeing it in colour and animated is a real treat. I had already decided that I would get the DVDs Geneon is currently putting out, so I didn't see any harm in getting the fansubs in time for Christmas so I could enjoy this wonderful piece of relationship drama with my best friend.

When the phone don't ring

Paradise Kiss tells a story about Yukari Hayasaka, a high school student who is dutifully studying for her university entrance exams, obeying her demanding mother's wishes like she has always done. By accident she is found by a group of art school students who are preparing for their final exams - a dress in a fashion show - who want Yukari to be their model. So Yukari gets plunged into a strange and fascinating world of fashion, and starts to question her life and what she wants to do with it. She is also in a middle of a love triangle - on the other side is her classmate Hiroyuki Tokumori, a nice, intelligent respectable boy who is going to medical school, and on the other side is the dashing genius fashion designer George Koizumi who is all those things your mama warned you about, but who takes Yukari's breath away.

Where do I start?

The Paradise Kiss team

When you first you see the anime it's simply gorgeous to look at. Madhouse Studios has done a superb job transferring Yazawa's already stunning art into moving form, but they have also brought in real fashion designers and make-up artists to help with making of the series to make sure the outfits and characters look as superb they are supposed to be (in fact the anime series spawned off a full line of ParaKiss clothes). For example, the clothing textures have been drawn by hand down to the lace and then applied into the animation as textures - the result is just exquisite. I've been watching the first DVD and listening to the dub this weekend while sewing and I have to say fansubs just don't do justice for this series - proper DVD quality is definitely recommended, the colours are just so much more vibrant and sharp.

Yukari and George

But although Paradise Kiss is pretty much as good looking as anime gets, it's meat and bones is of course in characters and their relationships. Yukari as the heroine is a genuine person with strengths and weaknesses - she has always just done as she is told and initially just transfers her loyalties from being what her mother wants her to be to what George wants her to be, but she has the strength and the courage to look into her heart and find what she wants to do and act on it. She makes mistakes, many of them, but like in real life they are seldom un-fixable and she has the power to regret and change her mind. George as the male lead is a difficult one - I see exactly what Yukari sees in him, and in the same way I'm drawn to him even when I know he's probably bad news. Yet George is not a bad person - he's honest, down to brutality, he knows what he wants and has the determination to chase it. He's not cold, in fact he's incredibly passionate, about his work, fashion, but also about Yukari and his friends and family. I hate and love him at the same time for what he is, knowing he won't change, no matter.

Miwako and Yukari

Then there are the supporting characters, the Paradise Kiss team: pattern maker transsexual Isabella who is like a mother to them all, and the dressmakers sweet pink-haired Miwako and her punk guitarist boyfriend Arashi who are involved in another love triangle with Tokumori. Especially Yukari and Miwako's friendship is very touching and real - Miwako is one of those types of anime girls that I would normally hate with a vengeance but she is special: she's genuine and warm-hearted and I can't help but to fall in love with her. She wants nothing more than for her friend to be happy, and she's whole-heartedly on Yukari's side no matter her choices. I also love the fact that Isabella's sexuality is a complete non-issue - she is what she is and it's not explained or pointed at until towards the end, and you get a hint of the tragedy that's behind that beautiful face.

How to get into trouble

If there's something I think the anime lacks, it's the exact ending of the manga - it's roughly the same but leaves out a lot of information that I thought was pretty vital. So if the ending leaves you wanting more, check out the manga - it will answer all the questions you'll have. And as always the manga has more material and goes into more depth with the characters - even though I have to admit the anime is a very faithful adaptation of it.

This is character driven drama with a fair bit of angst - but even though the setting is a glitzy fashion world, it's one of the most realistic pieces of anime (from the character interaction point) I've seen. If you've seen the live-action movie NANA that is also based on Ai Yazawa's fabulous manga and liked it, I would recommend checking out Paradise Kiss. If you like drama and relationships, I would recommend checking out Paradise Kiss. If you like big emotions and intelligent people, I would recommend checking out Paradise Kiss. If you like clothes and fashion, I would recommend checking out Paradise Kiss.

In fact, I would just recommend checking out Paradise Kiss. It's funny, it's sad, it's moving and gritty. It's real and fantastical. Simply superb.

Random conversations

It's only with Helena that I can have conversations that start with "back in England they knew how to..." or "you can't get it here...". There's a new bakery at Davie and Denman and when we drove past that today after yoga we got into a conversation about bread and other bakery products in Canada. I don't know why, but I've almost never gotten extremely good bread here - it was quite simple back in Europe, but bread here is just not quite the same.

Our deepest fear

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

- Marianne Williamson

Padma gave me this quote and it really resonates with me (and in case you're wondering I don't interpret God in the same way she probably does).

It's often really easy to get wrapped up in your own thoughts and believes. In the West it's said that "I think, therefore I am" which implies that your thoughts define you - that your thoughts become you. In the East the philosophy is more "I am, therefore I think" - starting from the fact that I exist and I am what I am, and that thoughts are not me, they are just a byproduct of me being. This is a model that makes more sense to me.

In the same model your mind is infinite - but it's your ego that tries to make it small to comfort you. Failing is easy - then you never need to progress or change. Success is scary - moving on, become better, chasing your dreams, taking control, being responsible. I don't want to be small, I want to be infinite. And I want to shine and be liberated and liberate others.

(Sorry if this didn't make much sense.)

Short update

Hi mom, hi dad! Everyone!

Since my entries have been so naval-gazingly depressing I though I'd better make a cheery entry just to let you know that I'm alive and feeling well. I've been active (and therefore eating) this week - in fact the reason I haven't been writing is that I've been busy. Wednesday sutra class (it's an eye opening self discovery journey), Thursday teaching (my class has tripled in three weeks - from one to three students!) and Friday... well, we were playing with the new Wii we finally got this week and eating pizza and watching anime. Today, Laura and Chris are coming over in few hours time, and I've already spent too much time sewing the Jiraiya costume, watching Princess Tutu (I'm in love) and surfing the net - now I really need to get back to the cleaning job...

And another update - Dragon/kolibri had it's 60,000th visitor just few minutes ago! The lucky visitor is probably a regular as they arrived here without a referral - using Windows XP and Firefox 1.5, from Stevenage, Norfolk. If you recognize yourself from that, please report to the comments and you'll get a virtual hug. Or something. Anyway, 60,000... that's, like, a lot.

Working

Few weeks ago my boss, the manager of our department, announced that she had resigned, and this is her last week. And she looks happier than I've ever seen her - relaxed, confident and I'm sure it's the best decision for her. Meanwhile we're looking for a new person to fill her shoes, but it's gonna take time so the department is bracing for impact and preparing to share the responsibilities she's been holding. I'd like to say that it probably isn't going to affect me in any way, but as my direct boss is going to have to take more responsibilities on him, he's probably going to roll some of his stuff onto me.

Work-wise I've been engrossed with SQL queries and regular expressions, I'm playing Rie fu and Akeboshi and Tommy february⁶ on my iPod and don't hear a word anyone else is saying.

Back to yoga

I decided to drop the full vegetarian diet, in the spirit of seeing if I can get a little bit of weight on my bones. This might not seem much to some people, but I ate four pieces of sushi (aka raw fish) today, and an apple and banana for a snack, and then went to yoga. My wrist is giving me some trouble, but I was doing down-dogs on my elbows and just took it one breath at a time... and made it through the class without giving up.

It's funny what endorphins you get from exercise do to you... I was feeling energized and was smiling while walking back home. And I was feeling hungry too before I got some food in front of me, now I'm struggling with eating it but I've got the whole evening.

Yep, baby steps indeed.

Sunday off

I took the Sunday off.

Yeah, I didn't leave the house, didn't go to yoga. But I took care of myself - watched some anime (more Ergo Proxy, I'm loving it), read some manga (Mushishi, it's completely stunning), sewed a little (but only a little). Spent quality time with Dragon, ate a fair bit.

I would be lying if I said I'm all right. I'm angsty, guilt-ridden and full of self-loathing. But I think today was a good day, and it's step towards the right direction.

Sleep now

I'm exhausted. I've been sleeping badly for the whole week, and this is payback I guess... We were supposed to go to Kiki's housewarming party yesterday, but I just couldn't muster it and fell asleep around nine. And slept for almost eleven hours which I never ever do. And I'm ready to do another ten hours right now...

We've had some of Dragon's friends over to watch tonight's UFC event which was pleasant and all, but I just can't take any cheery socializing right now.