Yoga on a hot day

Since we've had such a pathetic start for the summer, every time there's one hot day everyone skips practice. It has happened for several times now that when I turn up for primary series practice (and there's only one a week), there's just me and a fellow yogini Birgitte - and the custom of the studio is that there needs to be at least three people threre or the class won't happen.

So that's what happened today - it's a bad feeling when I come to corner of Pender and Broughton and I can see the studio and there's no one there. When I came in there was only Jason there, so I didn't even bother to roll my mat open - when Birgitte came in we just looked at each other with the "guess what" expression... She was adamant though - she had left work early and wanted to have a class, so Jason promised us one. So we sat on our mats chatting and waiting just in case someone else was coming - Jason was telling us about the teacher training coming in fall and it sounds wicked. They are aiming it to be cheaper than other courses (suits me!) and put in quite a lot of yin philosophy, so I'm thrilled - I think it's ideal that I can do the training with my current teachers.

I didn't even realise that before I wrote it down, just now. Yes, in my mind I have decided that I am going to do the yoga teacher training - whether it's going to be a new career for me, we'll see, but at this place and time it's something I really really want to do.

Anyway, waiting paid off as four other girls turned up to the practice after all - six of us alltogether. And because of the energy in the room, and there was a definite female energy that doesn't seem to happen with guys in the class, for some reason, this was the best practice in a long time. We had fun, we fell and giggled, and practiced sincerely, and got lot of individual attention.

Jason was talking a lot about Pattabhi Jois and Mysore, and I feel more and more that my ashtanga will never be "pure ashtanga". A year ago I really wanted to go to Mysore to study with guruji - now I find the thought... almost repulsive. Jason was saying - and with no malice, he was talking about dogma - that for example guruji doesn't accept modifications to asanas, and that if you can't do the full poses you're not allowed to advance in the series further until you do. Well, I can't accept that - there are some (even simple) poses I'll never be able to do because of my physical structure that no amount of mula bandha and breathing into it will never overcome, and to think that someone will judge me to be a worse yogini because of that makes me angry.

And that sort of perfection is not what yoga is supposed to be about, it's supposed to be for everyone, for all levels and all abilites. It's supposed to be a mental practice as much as a physical one, and it's supposed to be non-judgemental.

I love my ashtanga practice, but it's not, nor will it ever be, Mysore ashtanga.

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